pylea | ( DON'T BLAME ME, LOVE MADE ME CRAZY )

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( DON'T BLAME ME, LOVE MADE ME CRAZY )

[ yennefer has every intention of finally escaping geralt. she storms away from the roadside, uncaring if it means she now has to navigate the terrain alone until she stumbles upon a tavern and finds herself in the company of irritating people. she'll do it to spite him. yennefer's done plenty in her life to spite those around her, and she's won each and every time.

but after a good ten to twenty minutes, she slows her angry stomping. the earth doesn't quite shake beneath her feet as it did when she had spun away from him and flitted away from the roadside like the tornado he claims her to be. she begins to settle down, losing her wind. hardly regretting a moment of her own anger towards him, yennefer finds herself regretting much more.

telling geralt about her wish to be important to someone had cracked her open like the earth beneath the foot of an invisible giant. even as she tries to patch that gap so it no longer exists, a hairline fracture remains in its wake. she hates him for what he's taken from her. free will, her desire to belong—she doesn't want to be trapped in anyone's orbit but her own.

she takes a seat along thick round logs, back to the main road as she peers over the cliffside. all she sees is endless and unconquered terrain. it's looking out at the heads of trees that she decides her next plan of action. if she wants to spite geralt, she knows it's best to do it in front of his face.

she waits patiently for him to eventually arrive. she has no doubt that he won't. after all, didn't he wish for her? he's bound to find her once again.

the quiet's disrupted by the familiar clopping of roach's hooves. she listens carefully as he comes within earshot, his footfalls familiar and strong. she doesn't hear the sliding feet of jaskier trailing behind him pathetically. yennefer doesn't allow herself to feel pity for him losing jaskier. he deserved it.

she refuses to look at him, keeping her gaze straight ahead. she knows he'll stop. geralt is nothing if not inescapable. ] Did you piss off Jaskier, too? [ she scoffs, shaking her head. ] What a day you're having, Witcher.

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[Before the bite tells him everything, the way that she doesn't fully yield to him is apparent. It disappoints something deep in him, but what she gives him is enough. Having her in his arms is enough. For now.

He grunts softly in response to that nip, but doesn't return it. Perhaps it's an act of subservience, a way to offer her gentleness as an apology for his harshness. Maybe, just maybe, he thinks it's a little hot when she's rough with him.

But he pulls his lips back, still holding her face as he looks down at her.]

What do you want from me?

[ the one question she doesn't know the answer to. yennefer really wishes he would stop asking her of things that she hasn't quite figured out for herself.

even if it isn't purposefully strategic, the placement of his hands isn't lost on her. she wants to look away and it's as if he knows that's exactly what she wants to do. it wouldn't surprise him if he knew that. geralt has paid attention to her in ways that no one ever has before.

looking up at him, she sighs softly. ] I don't know.

[ it's a truthful answer, even if it's pathetic. ]

I'd like to hate you, but you make it impossible. I doubt that's truly surprising to you, since you are an impossible man.

[It is indeed a strategic hold that keeps her where he'd like her, but not precisely where he wants her. In peak fantasy, she has her arms thrown around him too and she's slack in his arms swooning. Reality is much harder to deal with, but worth so much more.

Still, sometimes his mind gets away from him.]

First time it's done some good for me. [He retorts, softly. He's practically forcing her to look at him, but he's sheepish.]

I'd like it if you didn't hate me. If you stayed.

[ she would very much like the opposite. it'd mean being yennefer of vengerberg, the sorceress with bite and anger, actually means something. but she's soft on the inside as she had once been as a young woman despite the hunch to her back and the shape of her jaw. she's hated for a while how he's able to touch that person she thought she had buried long ago.

looking at the tip of his nose, she lifts her gaze to his. ]

Do you think I would be here if I didn't want to be here? I would be far away with Roach by now if that were the case.

[ girls have to stick together. ]

I don't know.

[He says, honestly.]

I know what you want. I can't give you what you want.

[He's not naive enough to think that she might have some particular interest in Ciri for her own gain. However, as she said, she could just as easily take Roach and leave.

He knows he ought to stop questioning a good thing, but he doesn't trust a good thing.]

[ yennefer rolls her eyes. so presumptuous! while she wants his child surprise, while she wants a child, there are things that geralt doesn't know about her. what she wants is to feel like she's in the right skin and that she doesn't need to prove herself any longer. she wants to feel free and she wants to feel confident and she wants to feel like she can finally stop hunting for what she doesn't have.

funnily enough, she's already told him what she wants. she wants to feel important. to someone, to herself, to the world. it's unachievable in some respects, but he has given her what she wants even though she's tried to throw it back in his face. ]

You seem to know a lot of things, Geralt. Do you know that you're ruining the mood?

[ yennefer may not allow him to do that. she's finally feeling good. she knows he is, too. ]

[Geralt feels his comments hang in the air as a regretful, pensive silence falls over them for what seems like the longest time.

He's not dissatisfied with her response. It's biting, but he expects nothing less. There's a reassurance in there somewhere and he takes it.]

That shouldn't come as a surprise.

[And now he'll drop that conversation like an obedient dog.]

Do you want to ride or walk?

[ she takes that as her invitation to glance at roach before peering up at him again. either it's a test or a genuine invitation… and yennefer much prefers to think of it as the latter. she and geralt never seem to play the games the sorceresses do.

she cocks her brow and smiles up at him. ] Do you trust me not to run away with your horse?

[ and leave him all alone, truly as she had previously felt he deserved. if he says no, then she'll know what her next steps should be… and it's not an answer she wants him to give her. ]

Yes.

[He answers, easily. He offers her his hand to help her up, even though Roach is a good, steady mount and would behave. It's the gentlemanly thing to do, and he likes to play at being one from time to time.]

I trust her, at the very least.

[His expression is coy, slowly crawling out of that dark, guilty space he went to not moments before.]

[ yennefer thinks it's merely an excuse to not only touch her but to put himself to work. geralt is someone she thinks always needs a task at hand. she doesn't believe for one moment he knows how to live for himself.

it's sad. he deserves to live a life that isn't filled with hunting monsters and being paid shit money.

up on roach, she brushes her fingers through the horse's mane. she likes her. she's sturdy beneath her; she feels safe, much like geralt. that's one of the many reasons why she likes roach… other than roach merely being a good, kind animal and a companion to a lonely man.

yennefer smiles down at him. quietly, ] Thank you.

[ then she bats his fingers away. ]

Roach and I think you should walk a few feet behind us. Perhaps very slowly.

[ so she can thieve her away from geralt with sweet words he can't rebuke. it's all a part of her plan to get him to smile in exasperation at her childishness. ]

Does she?

[He humours her, just barely, by asking a leading question for her set up.]

I didn't think she knew the way, nor you. You're welcome to gallop full pelt into the forest without me, you'll find the trees all look the same after a certain point.

[He cocks his head up at her, eyes lingering for a moment before he sets a hand on Roach. It's too close to Yen's hand on the reign to be coincidence, but he's being a coward.]

What do you think of our chances, Roach?

[ roach, to her credit, wisely doesn't answer. perhaps he knows she's being pitted against the two of them. yennefer would like to think she's trying to keep the peace with her soulmate and her fellow woman.

she brushes her fingers gently through her hair, purposefully touching geralt's fingers. if he's going to be a coward, she will be brave. it does make her feel nervous; yennefer does her best not to show it. she thinks her touch is welcome, but geralt, to his credit, has always been difficult to read. she thinks she's just been lucky to have read him correctly thus far. ]

I suppose you still have your use for now. I make no promises when we run out of trees, Geralt.

[Geralt snorts under his breath, which hitches when her hand runs through his hair. He feels like he'll never grow accustomed to the intimacy of it or the warmth that pools in his gut.

And, so she cannot be unsure of it, his head tilts just slightly into the touch like he's a flower leaning into the sun.

The rest of the journey is done in largely companionable silence, until they find an inn for the night. Geralt leads Roach to the stables, stopping and extending his arms to help Yen down from her perch atop the horse.]

We should stop for the night.

[ although she's perfectly capable of unhorsing herself, yennefer does accept his help. she's allowed to be a romantic every now and then… and geralt makes her want to embrace one, especially when he invites her to with his rather uncharacteristic gentleness.

she doesn't let go of his hand.

arching the brow slightly in expectance, she lifts her gaze to his. ] Separate rooms?

[ yennefer hopes not. while she's still mad at him, she doesn't particularly want to be left alone in an inn when he's so near.

being near geralt is so complicated. ]

[Geralt doesn't let go, but he's also doing everything he can to avoid eye contact as he does. He needs to, eventually. He can't very well walk in holding hands with her. They'd look like fools.

He just wants a moment, breathe in her smell and pretend it's real.]

No. [He answers, quickly. That's not quite what he meant to say.]

Seperate beds? Suppose you'll be wanting a bath?

Yes.

[ although yennefer is as vain as they come, she knows she smells like utter shit. after the fight, after the mountainside, all the walking… she wants to feel clean and to scrub the day off. her feelings feel convoluted and sticky, and she wants to feel fresh. ]

I smell like shit. And while I sometimes like smelling like you, this isn't the scent I want to go to bed with.

[ she smiles at him, although she purposefully forces it. she's well-aware she's insulted him.

and she hasn't corrected him about the beds. she doesn't like that idea, being separated from him like that. even after everything.

fucking geralt. ]

[The insult just kind of sails over Geralt, like he's very used to commentary about his smell and yet has never sought to change it. Yennefer's scent, however, is something he enjoys very much.

..And he would agree that it has lost some of its lustre after the day.

So he simply nods, walking ahead to order them a room with a bath. He slides the coins forward quickly, trying not to visibly react to the cost. He slips back out, situating Roach into the stables and by then the room and bath is ready for them.

Geralt opens the door for her, letting her pass before entering.]

Is it to your liking?

[ it is, solely because he's there, though, yennefer won't admit as much. confessing that opens her to ridicule and his head growing ten times bigger than it is. ]

It'll do.

[ she's grateful, though. slipping into the room, she looks around at anything and anywhere that isn't him. she begins to slip out of her thick coat. ]

Is it to yours?

[ it's only fair she asks. ]

[She's only taking her coat off, and she has his full attention. Good god. If he'd known a set of shoulders could inspire feelings like this, he'd have taken his chances with Jaskier..

But he knows that's not true. And he knows he's glad that all of his mistakes lead him here. Back here. Those shoulders, those curls, the faded scent of flowers and berries and the teasing lilt to her voice.

He moves in behind her, arm circling around her and hand splaying as he guides her back. He presses his lips to her neck, softly. It's all gentle, all easy enough for her to pull away if she wishes.]

It is. [He murmurs against the shell of her ear, before he deviates and presses his face against her hair.]

You were gone a second and I mourned you like you were dead.

[ yennefer tilts her head to the side and smiles, especially knowing geralt may not be able to see it. although it's a lot easier to be mad at him, it's just as easy to fall into him. it's too easy. it's what she prefers. ]

Dramatic.

[ but she smiles. it's the kind of love song that she likes, deep, deep down. geralt can be sweet when he wants to be, despite all the roughness he's known for. ]

I'm still mad at you.

[ but that doesn't stop her from placing her hands against the back of his wrists. she doesn't try and tear him away. she wants to ensure his hands stay there, locked in place. ]

I know.

[He murmurs against her skin, soft and warm. It doesn't feel like it should have his rough, calloused hands on it. Undeserving of the gifts she hides under her dresses.

But..]

If you didn't want me here, you'd make me leave. [And he would. His hands start to pull at the laces of her bodice, drawing her dress open until he can slip it off her.

He wants her now, but..]

I take it you'll want the damned bath now?

[ now that he mentions it…

yennefer smiles. ] I do.

[ and if it'll frustrate him? even better. she doesn't try and stop him from undressing her. she wants her bath and she doesn't want to have it alone. but asking—or demanding—he comes with her only means that he gets what he wants… and yennefer wants to torture geralt just a little.

despite how tempting it is to glance over her shoulder at him, yennefer doesn't. she looks straight ahead and smiles, all the while knowing he won't see it. ]

Are you going to draw it? Or must I do everything?

[Geralt knows damn well he's being taunted here, but it's fine. It's the thrill of the chase, isn't it? Will they ever be a normal, loving couple or will they look for ways to infuriate each other until one of them dies?

He steps back, frowning even though he has the lovely view of her. He sheds his boots and his shirts, he'll work on his pants later. For now, he's going to step toward the big, empty tub and give her a dull look.]

I thought you'd be magicking in some perfumed water from the springs of a faraway land.

[Aka, I'm lazy you do it.]

[ look at that view.

yennefer gives him a slow once-over, uncaring if he catches her. geralt may be an oaf at times, but he's a very handsome, well-built oaf who isn't so horrible to look at. while other women may faint at the mere sight of his ghastly muscles and frightening golden eyes, yennefer experiences the very opposite. ]

You're very lazy, Witcher.

[ and when yennefer steps out of the clothing piled at her feet, she walks to the tub nake, brushing by him passive aggresively. she'll draw herself a fucking bath and make him smell like the sweetest flower his teeth rot. ]

Take off your trousers unless you need me to do that for you, too.

[ standing at the tub, she holds her hands out and does as he suggests—she calls forth the most perfumed water he'll ever smell. perhaps being overwhelmed by the scent will finally kill him. ]

[Geralt's eyes follow yen as she brushes past him, using immense restraint not to grab her as she walks past. As the pungent, floral smell fills the air, Geralt immediately regrets leaving this in her hands. He enjoys the perfumed scents on Yennefer, on himself? It's not his preference.

He grits his teeth as it spills into the tub, but he's unlacing his pants all the same. Being ordered to do so is a secret thrill and he's reasonably sure she's already figured it out.

His trousers drop to the ground and he steps over beside her, holding out his hands as if he means to help her into the tub like a servant would help a royal.]

After you.

( DON'T BLAME ME, LOVE MADE ME CRAZY )

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