i can never leave the past behind;

[descendent]

ALL OF THE GHOULS COME OUT TO PLAY
THE VAMPIRE DIARIES | copied and secretshame | TVD: pre-series. | where jenna becomes responsible and elena takes ten steps backward only to move five paces forward.

The last thing Elena hears is laughter. She had been laughing in the car with Mom and Dad, sitting in the back seat as they approached the bridge. And then -

What comes next is a blur. Elena's entire memory is groggy; she feels sluggish and slow, like a broken doll that's been put together with superglue but still is missing little vital pieces. When she comes to, it takes seven seconds for her mind to flicker into action, properly identifying the room as a hospital room. The itchy sheets that feel too thin to be her own between her fingers are those that dress the beds in the hospital she hasn't seen since she broke her arm at the age of fourteen. And, even then, she never saw these sheets; it was when Jeremy had severely injured himself that she was introduced to them.

Elena's hand goes immediately to her head. An IV is lodged into her vein. She moves awkwardly, tilting her head around to grab a sight of something identifiable. Where's the car? Where are her parents? She keeps looking for them, but she can't see their familiar figures standing at her bedside. Her mother's warm touch, her hand grasping her own, is missing. Elena feels ice settle in her chest.

The attempts to lift her head so she's not lying flat leads to her vision being blurred and a spinning in her sight. Everything is better if she stays horizontal. Her attempts only saw her head lift slightly from the very thin pillow; she doesn't feel strong at all. It's as if someone's drained her of all of her energy. She doesn't even know if anyone else is in the room, but she needs to be able to find her voice. If she can't, then this is all a dream she's experiencing while sitting in the backseat of her parents' car.

Her voice is croaky and soft when she says, "Why am I in the hospital?"

Comments

[secretshame]

Jenna would be lying if she tried to say she didn't care anymore about all of this responsibility. In all honesty, she was terrified - and what she wouldn't do to be able to go get high right about now to distract herself from everything - but she had an obligation to Elena and Jeremy now. Cravings and responsibility to her school be damned; her niece and nephew needed her. They were far more important.

She just... didn't quite know how to comfort them yet. Elena wasn't acting as confident as she always had. Jenna knew she must have been taking the accident very hard. She searched for something else to talk about, something that wouldn't depress them both.

"...Why don't you tell me about school? How're things going? How's cheerleading?"

A distraction would help, right?

[descendent]

A distraction would help. It seemed as though Elena's mind wasn't quite up for the task, though. Talking about cheerleading made her think of Mom and how she joined to follow her footsteps. Elena shrugged, "Caroline's running us into the ground. But it's the same as it's always been."

Cheerleading was a topic she didn't quite want to venture into. Jenna wanted to know about school; Elena figured she could at least prepare her for what was to come. She didn't think she'd have any problems integrating back into school life after this, but she knew that Jeremy liked to pretend everything was fine. He was the problem child, the one who didn't follow in everyone's footsteps like Elena did, and she worried what would happen in specific situations with specific people if he was pushed too far. "Mr Tanner's really got it in for Jeremy, though."

[secretshame]

Preparations would certainly help. Jenna wanted to know what she was getting herself into. Well, part of her wanted to know. The rest of her was terrified of it and what she had to deal with regarding Jeremy. Not really sure what else to do, she let Elena guide the conversation.

"What do you mean?" she asked, frowning at the mention of some guy named Tanner. She'd have to look at the list of teachers, too, and prepare for Parent / Teacher nights. Oh great. Jenna paled slightly at that thought.

Why was she doing this, again? Oh right, she wasn't letting Jackass Gilbert get his hands on the kids.

[descendent]

"He's hard on everyone," she tried to clarify. Singling Jeremy out was probably not the best of ideas she'd had so far, but she knew that she couldn't ignore her concern for him. Tanner had the ability to break the toughest person down into tears. She could handle him on her case, for her sloppiness at completing homework and the set readings, but she didn't quite know if Jeremy could take any more beatings than he already had.

She shrugged, trying to phrase it in a way that would achieve what she didn't wish to convey; singling Jeremy out. "Jer's sensitive. And Mr Tanner ..." She sighed. She was really kidding herself thinking she wasn't as sensitive as Jeremy post-all of this. Not quite meeting Jenna's eyes, Elena continued after a few beats, "He just knows what buttons to push."

[secretshame]

That clarification didn't really make Jenna feel any better about all of this, but she pursed her lips and nodded anyway. "Okay. I'll deal with it." Somehow. She still wasn't sure how they were going to manage all of this, but somehow they would have to.

She was terrified of the responsibility, but what was more frightening was the idea that she could fail them and then lose them. If she had anything to say about it, that wouldn't happen. Adulthood. Right. She could do this.

"He'll be okay. And so will you."